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Its not personal!

I haven’t written anything for a few weeks now, I felt a bit blocked ( I know writers block for a blog, who knew).

This week I felt I needed to discuss something that I have struggled with for years and still do.  I am sure we all do at times and some people may let it effect them forever !  That is taking things personal and to heart !

But I am going to share a personal story that happened only last week. Not all the details, but the moral of the story.

 Last week I had a horrible time and done something I haven’t done for some time, took to my bed!  Why ? Have I had a tragedy? Incurable disease? Nope, someone went all out to be sheer nasty about me!   Won’t go into details, but let’s say it wasn’t about anything other thanks anything other than to hurt me.
Did it ? Yes but only  for about ooh  a day, because people and friends helped and I shook myself and gave myself a good talking too and realised… SERIOUSLY Janine, you are better than this!  Get up, dust off the crown and get on with being you!

Not long ago, it would have hurt me  for so so long, bothered me, hurt me forever.

I would ask why have they done this ? I would cry and feel the world is against me …. Its not the world, its one person !

But NOW, yes I am hurt, ( I am human) but am I going to let it bother me? stop me ? get me down?  NO!!

Because its not my problem, its theirs!

Don’t get me wrong, I am human, the fact that someone, dislikes me enough to say things and do things to me, is a bit disturbing, but they will win, if I let it get to me forever.  But it actually made me refocus on something I have wanted to do for years… so watch this space.

So how do we stop taking thing so personally?  It is hard, but we can train ourselves and our minds to let it go and aim to not let it effect us.

  1. Realise and accept : other peoples rudeness and behaviour, is NOT a reflection on you or YOUR issues. It is normally a reflection of them and their issues.
  2. Think and ask yourself: If someone doesn’t talk or say hello, or behave in a certain way, it may mean something else , ie they may be shy, ie its their issue or insecurities and not something you have done.
  3. Let it go : if some gives criticism or makes comments to you, can you you  LEARN from constructive comments ? If not LET IT GO!
  4. Accept : you CANNOT please everyone!
  5. Its ok : you may not be someones cup of tea and thats absolutely FINE. Because you are others!
  6. Know : you are  NOT defined by your mistakes
  7. Love and accept: realise and love YOU and recognise  YOUR OWN self worth. You are not defined by others opinions.
  8. Remind self: there are some people who are just not that nice and no matter what we do, they will be not nice!
  9. Remember: what others say about you, is none of your business ! 
  10. Be the best you can be for YOU!

Things, people, words, situations will always be sent to challenge us, but remember it says are about them than it does about you.

So remember to let it go, it’s not personal, it’s them. You are the better person, by learning not to let it get to you!

Have a brilliant week all and all my love

Janine

 

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